What if my stepchild doesn't want to be adopted in Maine?

If your stepchild is 12 or older, Maine requires their consent to the adoption (18-C M.R.S. § 9-302), so their feelings are not a side issue. They are part of the legal process, and it makes sense to work through the hesitation before you file anything.

Why a child might hesitate

• Loyalty to a biological parent, and a worry that adoption "replaces" them
• Fear of change, even when the family already feels settled
• Not fully understanding what adoption means
• General resistance to big adult decisions, especially in the teen years

What can help

• Have a calm, age-appropriate conversation about what adoption does and does not mean. Let your stepchild ask questions and say how they feel without pressure.
• Reassure them that adopting does not erase their history or their feelings about their biological parent.
• Listen more than you explain. A child who feels heard is often more open over time.
• Give it time. Nothing forces you to start now, and a Maine stepparent adoption typically takes 3-6 months once you file in Probate Court.
• Consider family counseling if the hesitation runs deep or the topic causes conflict.

If your stepchild is under 12

The consent requirement in Maine starts at age 12. How the Probate Court takes a younger child's wishes into account is a question for the Probate Court clerk in your county or an attorney. Even so, it is kind and wise to involve a younger child in ways that fit their age, so the adoption feels like something that happens with them and not to them.

If your stepchild says no

Whether any other option exists in a particular situation depends on the facts of your family, and we can't tell you how a court would handle it. For that kind of question, talk with the Probate Court clerk in your county or a Maine family law attorney.

Waiting until adulthood

Maine also has an adult adoption process, which typically takes 4-8 weeks. Some families decide to wait until a child is 18 and can make the choice entirely on their own. The Probate Court clerk can confirm the details for your situation.

How we help

StepParent Adoption 360 is a document preparation service, not a law firm. When your family is ready, you answer questions online and we prepare the complete court document package for your Maine county. You then file it yourself, without an attorney. The price is $349 for the first child and $99 for each additional child, and you receive court-ready documents within 24-48 hours after the questions are finished. We have helped 151 Maine families, and our work comes with a 100% court acceptance guarantee.