In this answer · 2 sections
Texting your spouse is NOT meaningful contact with the child. In New Jersey, abandonment under N.J.S.A. § 9:3-46 is about the parent's relationship with the child — not with your spouse.
What counts as contact WITH THE CHILD:
- Visits with the child
- Phone calls or video calls to the child
- Letters or messages directed to the child
- Participation in the child's activities, school, or medical care
What does NOT count:
- Texts to your spouse about unrelated matters
- Texts to your spouse saying "tell the kid I love them" (without actual contact)
- Social media posts about "missing" the child
- Conversations about child support or custody
- Any communication with adults that does not involve actual interaction with the child
If the bio parent has had no direct contact with the child for 6+ months, regardless of their texts to your spouse, the court can find abandonment.
We prepare your abandonment affidavit documenting exactly this situation — the distinction between contacting your spouse and contacting the child. Courts understand this difference.
Cost: $349 | Court: Superior Court | Timeline: 3-6 months
Start at stepparentadoption360.com/portal/register.
Stepparent adoption in New Jersey at a glance
- Court
- Superior Court
- Residency before filing
- No minimum period
- Typical timeline
- 3-6 months
- Court filing fee
- $200-$350
- Child's consent
- New Jersey does not require the child's consent; a child 10 or older attends the final hearing and the court considers the child's wishes
- Home study
- Usually waived for stepparents
- New Jersey families we've helped
- 1,204
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