Can I adopt my stepchild if the bio parent only sends texts to my spouse but never contacts the child in Washington?

Yes, it may be possible. Washington sets no fixed number of months for abandonment. Under RCW § 26.33.120, abandonment depends on the other parent's overall conduct. A parent who only texts your spouse and never contacts the child is a situation a Superior Court judge can weigh when deciding whether abandonment applies.

Why the texts to your spouse matter less than you might think. Washington courts look at the parent's overall relationship with the child, not one narrow piece of it. Messages sent to your spouse are communication between adults. What the court will want to understand is what real connection the parent has kept with your stepchild. Whether the texts change the outcome in your case is the judge's decision, and the Superior Court clerk or an attorney can speak to your specific facts.

What to gather:

• A timeline of the parent's contact with the child: visits, calls, cards, gifts, and involvement in school or medical care.
• The texts themselves, so the court sees exactly what was and wasn't said about the child.
• Any record of child support, which doesn't prevent an abandonment finding if the parent hasn't kept up meaningful contact with the child.

Other Washington requirements that apply:

• Court: You file in the Superior Court. Washington has 39 counties.
• Residency: There is no minimum residency period (RCW 26.33.030).
• Child's consent: If your stepchild is 14 or older, their consent is part of the process (RCW § 26.33.160).
• Background checks: Criminal background checks are required for adoptive parents.
• Home study: It is not automatically waived (RCW 26.33.220). Washington allows courts to waive it in some stepparent cases, and the clerk can tell you how that works in your county.
• Timeline: Stepparent adoptions typically take 3-6 months.
• Costs: Court filing fees run about $200-$500, and the total typically stays under $1,000. Hiring an attorney commonly costs $3,000-$5,000+.

If the other parent contests. If the parent objects once they're notified, or if your situation is unusual, an attorney can advise you on that specific issue. Courts in Washington are supportive of stepparent adoptions that serve a child's best interest, and adoptions can be completed without the other parent's consent when abandonment is established. Each case still turns on its own facts.

How we help. StepParent Adoption 360 is a document preparation service, not a law firm. You answer questions online, and we prepare the complete court document package for your county. You file it yourself without an attorney. The price is $349 for the first child and $99 for each additional child, and your court-ready documents arrive within 24-48 hours after you finish the questions.